Tuesday Movie Reviews

Ninja Assassin
Starring: Rain, Naomie Harris, Ryan Maslow
Directed by James McTeigue

By no means is this movie going to win any awards for writing, but if you want a little bit of fun for an hour and a half you could do much worse than Ninja Assassin. If you remember those great kung fu movies of the 70's, you'll appreciate this film. It has all the mystique of the Ninja...how they move in the shadows, how ruthless they are in their kills, blood, blood, blood. What I liked most about this film is that you could tell they didn't take themselves too seriously. The blood that spewed was obviously added in digitally, making the fight scenes seem almost cartoonish...but it worked! Definitely not a movie for everyone, but the pure action will suffice a true fan of the genre. The director McTeigue directed another fun action movie, V For Vendetta, which I recommend watching as well.

GRADE: B

Did You Hear About The Morgans?
Starring: Hugh Grant, Sarah Jessica Parker, Mary Steenburgen, Sam Elliott
Directed by Marc Lawrence

I didn't have great expectations when I put this movie in the old DVD player and I turned out to be right on the money. Grant and Parker play a separated, high profile couple that witness a murder. For their own protection they are sent to Wyoming until the FBI can locate the killer. Hilarity ensues...or tries to anyway. The jokes are lame, the writing is awful and Hugh Grant looks like he's embarrassed to be there. I usually like Grant's stuttering, English-style Bob Newhart shtick, but it just doesn't work here. Parker, who I never found talented or easy to look at, fails every step of the way. The only saving grace is Sam Elliott, finally back in his cowboy outfit that works incredibly well for him. The outtakes in the Special Features weren't even funny! Predictable and boring.

GRADE: D-

Good Hair
Starring Chris Rock, Eve, Maya Angelou, Ice-T, Nia Long, Al Sharpton
Directed by Jeff Stilson

I have never been a fan of Chris Rock. I don't find him funny. He seems, to me, to try too hard for a laugh and usually comes across mean instead of funny. That being said, this documentary about the struggles of black people and their hair was quite funny. It was also incredibly eye-opening. Rock interviews some celebrities as well as some "common" people about the craziness that goes along with making a black person's hair look good. I had no idea about the cost of hair weaves. I was blown away that women spend thousands of dollars on these things. But the film goes a little more in depth with regards to the reasons why, women mostly, go through what they do. Did you know that the chemical in hair relaxer can eat through an aluminum can in less than 5 hours? Children as young as 2 put this crap in their hair!! Crazy, but presented in an interesting enough way that it should hold your attention.

GRADE: B

Now, a new feature to my Tuesday Reviews...other movies released today and my impression of them. (I could be totally wrong, but I often guess pretty close to their true entertainment value).

The Princess And The Frog - looks pretty good, kids should love it.
Armored - looks like average action, probably a predictable twist.
Astro Boy - looks like it could be fun for young kids
The Fourth Kind - looks awful.
Broken Embraces - Penelope Cruz and Pedro Almodovar...must be good!